it's so funny how i want the qualities my sister has and vice versa. she thinks I'm upfront and in your face and I tell it like it is. for some reason i just don't see that but it's something she admires. i wish i could be as compassionate as she is. i think she's real, what you see is what you get and sometimes i don't see that in myself.
i got to experience something today that i really don't think is a big deal. smoking for the first time. it's a college thing and i find that now is the time to try it.
this relationship i'm in is fake. well, it's not even an official relationship. but when i'm around him i'm not being myself. I'm trying to be this really chill, heartless, and emotionless girl. and if you don't know me, i'm the total opposite. the reason i'm putting on this facade is so i won't get hurt but i have a feeling i'll be thrown to the curbside. i need to find a guy that cares.
i believe that to be in a real relationship with someone, you are able to be yourself and talk about anything.
ReplyDeleteit may take time to open up to someone though. buttface and i had the same problem. we both never really opened up to each other. but it was also my one-sided love for him; i was stubborn. you want to be with a guy that is always willing to listen to what you have/want to say. there's somebody out there that cares about you, i promise.