angst cookies

these feelings of mine come and go. agnst.

this week by far was the most bleh week. not bad, just bleh. (i say that for many things. dont judge) i had 1 big test and 1 quiz today. i think i did okay on the test but not the quiz. yea, whatthefuckever. grades have been posted for some classes and i'm a bit depressed. two 5 page papers to do, due on tuesday. this weekend doesnt look so bright; besides the weather.

my dad is giving me hell about lying on my taxes and not working too much. just ugh. times like these all i can fall back on is my family (in this case, not my dad). my sister just got back from lunch and we can just talk for hours. my cousin keeps calling me and it's nice to hear from him because i don't see much of him anyways. his birthday is next weekend and were going to p.f. changs. then it's time for the medieval fair. wooo! little secret: i'm going to try and invite someone i miss very much, to go with me. who knows if he'll say yes but it's worth a try, right? so i'm taken. unless he says 'no' and i'm heartbroken again and then i'll need some help. the only people i want to be around is my family. i feel like school is killing me inside.

i'm starting to have feelings for a man friend that i have been hanging out with (i guess we could just call it dating now). people say things, people say a lot of things. i know friends want me to be cautious but i feel like i'm the only one knowing what i'm getting myself into. afterall, he is single, he can do what he wants. things are progressing quite nicely but a little too quickly for my taste. my ideal guy would be in school...why do i keep attracting losers?

i'm looking forward to a better week. luck, don't fail me now. afterwards i want to go bike riding around hefner. matt, you in?